Dusk, a dream, and a wish

What is a wish, mama, asked her little girl, her hand tucked safely within hers, as they walked briskly up the hilly road back the house.

It was turning dark quickly, with shadows forming in the corners, and this had prompted the child to tuck her body closer.

A wish, my dear, is when your heart badly wants something to happen, she answered. How are wishes born ?, Came the follow up.

How indeed, she asked, swallowing hard, as she almost said, they are born from the deepest crevices and holes of your heart. Sometimes prompted by love, sometimes by loneliness, sometimes by something as innocuous like a fragment of a song, or the familiar crinkle in the eye in an unfamiliar face.

But to her little girl she said “they come from your dreams, sweetheart”. You know. The dreams you get just before dawn, just as you are waking up ? The daylight turns those dreams into your wishes so that you don’t forget them.

So I dreamt of Fluffy before we adopted him ? Yes, and you loved him before you met him. As I dreamt of you before I met you.

Tell me again how you met me mamma, I want to hear the story again. Again, she laughed gently, her smiling voice drifting into the breeze. I’ve told you a million times darling. I want to hear it again, and i want the princess version this time, came the retort. Aren’t you a little too old for that ? No… i want to hear it mamma.

Well, here goes

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, lived a King and Queen, she began, her voice full of laughter. They loved each other very much and were very happy. But there was one thing missing in their happiness. And one day, suddenly, the Queen dreamt of this beautiful princess with shiny black hair and big, naughty eyes and a shy sweet smile. The queen kept asking her name but the little princess never replied, only smiled. Every night, just before dawn, just before she woke up for her morning walk, the dark haired princess would appear in her sleep, laugh and talk and play with her, but never give her name. And every time the queen opened her eyes, she would be gone. This made the queen very very sad, so she started praying to Krishna – O God, she said, please send me this beautiful princess and please also tell me her name, so i can use it when i see her next. But Krishna remained silent as the months turned into years.

But suddenly one night, after many many nights of prayers, when she had almost given up hope, one day, Krishna asked her – Will you love her more than anything else in the world, and always be there for her ? And the queen replied, more than life itself, Krishna, more than life itself.

So be it, said Krishna, and lo and behold the next morning, a dark haired little baby girl was waiting for the queen in the morning, the baby version of the little girl she had been seeing in her dreams every night for months. And as she picked her up into her arms, her heart bursting with love and joy, she heard the dream princess whisper in her ear – my name is Tia, my mamma. I am Tia.

So you see, my darling, you came to me in my dreams and that turned into my deepest wish. I knew I loved you long before I met you, you know.

I love that story mamma, said little Tia, sighing happily, as she turned and gave her mother a wet and chocolatey kiss. I do too sweetheart, I do too, she said.

Not all wishes come true though, she said wistfully, some just make their way from the wish shaped holes in your heart into your dreams and stay there as a reminder of what could not be. Sometimes doubt and fear make their homes inside those wish shaped holes and refuse to leave.

But the best ones become wishes, and ever so often, the best of the best , they become your whole life, she thought, as they turned the corner and the light from the front porch went on to greet them. Those other dreams, they weren’t really that important. Sometimes heart stopping, some times bittersweet, but not that important after all. It is alright, she thought … to let them just fade away.